The year was 2002 and it was not the best year of my life. Newly divorced, looking for a job in an unfamiliar city, far from my family. I felt lonely and overwhelmed. The great loneliness had arrived in my life.
When you are falling down the rabbit hole, making a decision during the fall "is not the best decision" I learned that over time. However, economic necessity pushed me to take that job "Customer Service Analyst in the auto claims department".
Today I wonder what the fuck I was thinking at the time, how a person with emotional problems and falling into the abyss of depression was going to be able to help others with their problems in the insurance maze, yet I did it and not only did I do it but I lasted 5 years in a job that I hated, not because of the external customers, but because of the internal customers, my obscure co-workers. They made my life miserable.
Dealing with the public and their problems helped me cope with my own, that was the easy part of my job; but my coworkers, they were something else. It was a world of gossip, ill-intentioned comments. I felt insecure in that environment. Anything I said could be used against me, and that was the case on many occasions.
In spite of doing my job well, filling vacant positions and giving my boss vacations, I was never promoted to the position of coordinator. Do you want to know why? I'll tell you why.
One day my boss called me into his office and in a few words told me that he was going to make me area coordinator as long as I told him absolutely everything my coworkers did. That was very strange to me. My response was withering. If the actions of my coworkers went against the fulfillment of their duties she would know immediately, however, I was not going to be part of that world of gossip that was handled in the underworld.
I was never given the position of coordinator and after that conversation I understood that the best thing I could do for myself was to look for another job, by the way, the best decision I made at that historic moment in my life.
This story was written for the #theweekend community for their Weekend-Engagement writing prompts: - 138.
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Life is one, so every moment counts. Do the best you can.
