Silent Struggles and Reconfigurations

in #hive-15385022 days ago

When I tell people that I attended a military secondary school, they usually just look at me head-to-toe in disbelief. For whatever reason, most people think that I should be buff, big, and mighty as a person who went through such a school. I don't blame them, simply because I am just a normal guy with more brain power than physical—for now.

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Anyway, I did attend a military school, and I hated most of the days I was in that environment. I looked forward to the day I would march for the last time in that compound, out the gate, and then back again, commemorating my passing out parade for my graduation.

I spent three years rather than six, and so I was thrust into a group of students that had already gotten the hang of things in the years they had been there prior. I, on the other hand, was one of the "transfer mumus" of the set. Mumu—a Nigerian slang meaning perplexed or ignorant person. And so SSS1 was a crazy rollercoaster, as well as the remaining years.

If I think of the unfair moments I experienced in that environment, inspired by the community's prompt, I would just have an endless list on a very long scroll, like the ones they used in the medieval times. But let me focus on the senior-junior relationships I had during that time.

Bullying is never acceptable in most places. And usually, there would be existing systems or rules against bullying. At the Navy secondary school I attended, however, it's a bit more complicated than it should be.

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When you are bullied by a senior, reporting that senior isn't usually the smoothest of rides. There is the possibility of being reprimanded for reporting a senior, and there is the possibility of suffering unpleasant aftereffects of reporting if you successfully make the report and "get what you want." Thankfully, because things had gotten much easier during my time, the former was less likely.

I didn't realise that when you're treated unfairly by a senior, you were to just go through it like a Navy Boy and maybe circumvent your way around it somehow. Reporting usually doesn't turn out well. But I did on one of the days I had newly joined the school, and it had to be a class prefect. Damn.

I was beaten unfairly early in the morning of the one of the weekdays. If I remember well, it surely wasn't a cane but something worse. It was probably the heavy wood of one of those big hoes or something just as dense. And then I reported that event to a class teacher.

The class teacher summoned the senior, who happened to be the captain of the hostel I sleep in, and openly chastised him for what he had done to me. Unknown to me at the time, what had happened to me was really a normal thing in that school. Nothing much happened to the senior, but a lot happened to me instead.

The next thing I knew, the hostel roster for clean-up duties was refreshed, and I appeared more times than before, like I had a medal in cleaning up and was most qualified. Even when I would finish with my chores, I would often be asked by this same senior, being the house captain, to push out the water in the gutter with a broom, having dressed for the day.

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For the same reason that I reported a senior, the colleagues of that senior also put their spotlights on me. I couldn't live in peace. Some of them may not need water at the time they spot me coming into the hostel after school hours, but I will mount up their buckets for me to fill for them. I couldn't really say no to that, as that would defy the school's existing system for respect, sort of. And I could get punished or beaten for declining.

It continued that way for weeks, and then I slowly realised that reporting a senior wasn't exactly a great choice to make if you don't have solid backing, like being the son of a renowned military officer, having a fearsome guardian for an officer in the school, or reputable school father(s) that could mediate for you.

So imagine the many unfair treatments we had to go through in silence because of how things worked then. But this was just one of the "good days" back then. Imagine being treated badly by an officer instead. Or worse, going through unpleasant times with the commandant himself. There were worse days. Worse days. And I hated everyone of them.

There were good times, too, and they were usually with my colleagues, going through the times together. And the day I graduated was the happiest of those times. Would I choose to go through such an experience if I could go back in time, though? Absolutely! Simply because I think I am a much better person now because of all my experiences then, good and bad.

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Someone doesn’t believe you attended a military school?
Then they don’t know you up close maybe,
But guess what? I also attended a military basic school…surprise surprise

I never understand how these things work in high school, you report only for the whole issue to get worse. Maybe it’s because I attended a girls school

You that you now know me up close, I wonder what you think...😁

But guess what? I also attended a military basic school…surprise surprise

Surprise surprise o. When will you share about it? I imagine you were stubborn then...

Maybe it’s because I attended a girls school

I actually forgot to add that mine was a boys' school. I wonder how much of a difference there is.

I went to a military school when I was in primary and Junior high

But senior high is different

Oh I was only stubborn at home

Of course, we're talking about Abena here.

Of course I believe you attended a military school, it's actually written all over you. I'm wondering why some people don't believe you 😂.

Anyways, it's sad that reporting only made things worst for you. Although it's good to know you had some good times in the school too.

By the way, I love your images 😌

Written all over me? You people will come and explain, you and Abena because I wonder. 😁

You know, one time, I changed it for one senior that was overdoing his own. There were crazy days in that school actually. But we thank God now.

By the way, I love your images 😌

Oh, stopeeet. Lol. Thanks!

We are not explaining anything right @abenad? 🌝

How did it go? I'd love to know 🤓

Oh no, I can't stoppit, those pictures were dope! 😉

So, there are times when you can actually report a senior and get actual justice and not be bothered by anyone. Extortion, especially when it is too much, can be reported. An immediate senior tried his best to extort me all term one time, but I never bulged and always dodged him. He'd catch me sometimes and punish me at night for disobeying, but I never cared since I got to eat my piece of meat or keep my money rather than handing it to him. One night that he was really beating me, I just left and was going to report that time, and that's how this almighty senior crumbled, begging. It was a wawu moment. He knew he could get expelled for all he had done to me.

Yay!!! See how this brought smile to my face, justice for little Jay 😁.

Ehen ehn, people shouldn't be getting awe with that kind of thing for too long. Thank God you didn't keep putting up with that rubbish and summoned the courage to speak up and God did it that he was scared 🥳💃

I am usually a patient person, until the day the cup overflows. That's when I will now vex. Thank you, Hope.

Well, keeping your calm as much as you can is not so easy, that's a good one Jay 😊

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I attended a Naval school too, not secondary though but primary and I am grateful I didn’t go to the high school.

Bullying could leave stigma in people. Well I wonder why most people are bullies

Oh, really? What Navy School is that? And is it NNPS? We called ours NNSS, Nigerian Navy Secondary School, and it was in Ogun State.

Bullies are usually cowards, actually. They usually have low self-esteem and cover up and get off on bullying other people instead. That's what I think.

Hehehe. Those were harsh treatments done to you. Geez, this is what happens in most schools, if not all especially when it's a boarding school. Imagine those unfair moments you had to go through. It is true that if you'd gotten some sorts of backings to defend you then, things would have been less harsh with you. But in all, you learnt a lot of lessons and that is one thing about life.

It was such a rollercoaster then o...But I sure am glad that I went through that school as it built me well. Although harsh, but I am grateful. Did you also attend a boarding school?

No, I didn't.

Oh wow! You are Military Man. Which department has selected you there. Military institute are most disciplined one, it is hard to follow all their instructions. Anyway, it is good to know you have more capabilities. In Navy, bullying to junior or senior I didn't consider it good. We should avoid it is bad merit inside us if we are doing this. Indeed some seniors can be aggressive and beat us. If you can fight with strong hands then there is no need to be the son of Army officer. Otherwise, I agreed about the idea of army officer son. Detective you have really hive police 😂.

Lol, Slammer. Fighting a senior is probably the worst response to such situations. Not only did the school frown at it, but there was always a very high chance of being ambushed by many seniors, and that would be such a regretable day. I wasn't the kind to get physical with people anyway, so that never crossed my mind.

Refusing as senior is not an easy task for a junior. So I can understand this situation you encountered in the past. Although I am always I am always a cool person, I would stop maintaining the senior-junior relationship if they dare to cross certain limit. It's because if I became angry, I don't care about my life, let alone thinking about injuring my seniors. Fortunately I in rare cases I became angry and rarely people come to mess with me. Or it can also be possible no people take me seriously because of my super cool mentality 🤣. !LOL

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I think I know your type of person. All these silent warriors 😅
I should be afraid of you, man. But, actually, I am actually like you in the sense that I am a very calm and collected kind of person.

Thankfully, I have been out of that place for about a decade now.

Just imagine the temerity these guys had to be bullying a whole starboy! If I catch them ehn...

Anyway, I can't begin to imagine how it must have felt since almost the opposite was my case. But I'm glad it built you to being the amazing person you are now.🌹

Somebody's starboy for that matter! Can you imagine the tensegrity? Or what's that word again?😅 👀 Just imagine!

Kamsamida, Fangy. 🖤

Wait. Opposite? Now I am curious. You'll tell me about it o.

Yes, the tensegrity. What course did you say you studied in Uni again?😂

And yeah about the opposite thing, how much will you pay me to share the story? 😂

Let's focus on our future, madam. Leave tensegrity and what I studied in the past 🤣

...how much will you pay me to share the story?

A wise woman once told me 5 HBD is the lucky number 👀

Which kind of woman said that one again? What's lucky about 5 HBD?😂

Anyway, let me just manage it. What can we do?🙃

So, service before payment, ehn? Whenever you're down!

🤣🤣🤣

😀

😂😂😂

Too much bullying and ragging is allowed to go on in schools, hostels and colleges by authorities in the name of "it builds up men" bullshit. I really do hope that we will see the end of this kind of macho behavior sometime in the future. The complaining to seniors affecting us continues into professional life too for the same reasons - the authorities don't care :(

Good snapshot of your past mate. I for one am happy you are handsome and smart as you are and not just a dumb hulk :) Cheers from a fellow #dreemerforlife

Dumb hulk cracked up 😅

It was a boys' school, actually so yes, it was more like that "building up a man" thing. It didn't have to be that way, really. Sadly, it transcends into our daily lives, like at work. Not many peopl do much about it. What's the highlight of the week so far for you?

alas it has been all lowlights thanks to work pressures :) Only highlight has been checking out smosh videos at night before going to sleep. Got time to curate some today, yesterday I missed that too :(

Oh, yeah? What are smosh videos, though? Anyway, I'm glad you're solid despite it all. And that you're still kicking on Dreemport.

Such experiences can be very traumatising, especially if you came in to school hoping to have extensive freedom and certain rights. Similar incidences occurred in my high school and just when we were about becoming prefects, the school placed a ban on such activities; threating to expel any senior student who was reported. Of course we were all hurt because we had somehow planned to be evil like our predecessors but again, it saved the up coming students from the trauma we faced .

Eii... I for vex o. So after all the years of suffering, they just woke up one morning to say that you couldn't be evil like you were evil-ed? Daaaaaa...

But wait. So you have this strong mind of wickedness behind your gentle face, ehn Wongi McSpending?

Oh...plenty people vexed, especially our male colleague as they were the ones that went through the most hell.

The reason why I was mad wasn't because I couldn't punish students but because the junior students started taking advantage of the opportunity. If they were sent on an errand, they would refuse to go and if you now touch them, you would be expelled😂. The pain of having to fetch my own water after I waited years to be able to send junior students.

So you have this strong mind of wickedness behind your gentle face, ehn Wongi McSpending?

Wongi McSpending that's new🌝. I was far from being a wicked senior but let's just say that I become evil once in a blue moon.😌😌

Oh, yessss Now I understand. Of course, I would have been mad as well. I anybody would, especially on the disrespect and fetching water yourself. Damn it!

Yeah, it rings well in my head with Wongi. Don't know where it came from. That once a blue moon could bring the end of the world, ehn?

Don't know where it came from.

Then I'd take it😌

That once a blue moon could bring the end of the world, ehn?

Not necessarily 😂. A few lot would learn life lessons they didn't learn in school.

Ah ahn, so you sef be lesson teacher?? Mad 😂

Reporting a senior in a normal boarding school is suicide talk more of a military school. I feel for you honestly, but it's life, the combination of those experiences is what makes us who we are. Why didn't you further on the navy line?

You're a true comrade of understanding.

I didn't continue to join the military because I didn't want the military life for myself. It's not my thing.

Hehehehe, it is well my papa..

I understand, let's call it fate🥰

Many of us grew up attending schools where we thw smallies were bullied by the big men
In my case it was even those in the same class's with you that did all that and of course we had no gods to do anything silly, hehe. Na just to endure and endure, hehe
#dreemport

Na so so endure I just endure till I graduate o, my guy. I'm thankful for the time there, but even more that it's all in the past now.

They gave one boy urine to drink. This happened at NDA, unfortunately for the seniors the boys father is an officer. The seniors were immediately rusticated though, like you asked what is his father is a nobody??? It is well.

Exactly! In the military, if you don't have people at the top, things may be a little rough for you. I sha made it out eventually, thankfully!

Love that you stood up for yourself, Jay! And you took the consequences... I would have hated being in a military school with such inadequate protections and in an environment where bullying was seemingly encouraged. You did well to stick it out! Now you just need to get through your teaching assignment so you can focus on the things that bring you more joy 🥰🤭😜 !LUV !ALIVE !PIMP

I dropped in from Dreemport today.

#dreemerforlife


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Thank you, Sam! I mean, it did get worse each day, but I managed regardless. But I hated most days there, actually.

I really want to get my teaching assignment over with as quickly as possible. 😀 I don't enjoy it one bit.

I always appreciate your kind words, Sam. You teach me!

I am just a normal guy with more brain power than physical—for now.

I like that you added for now better things will still happen.

like I had a medal in cleaning up and was most qualified.

You were the perfect guy for the job😂😂😂

This is a comrade of understanding!

You were the perfect guy for the job

Story of my life. Lol

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The Good thing that despite the worst treatment there you still graduated. Thats the Good part of it.

Oh, yes. I mean, education was taken seriously there, so I had that rollercoaster to ride too. But yet, I graduated eventually.

That's the victory that you graduated even after everything. You stood strong and graduated at the end is the exciting thing. Most student would have stopped schooling because of that.